Bless you little hummingbird who lives near my office: the way you buzz around like God’s very own tiny remote-controlled helicopter
I’m convinced Tim Burton will produce any movie featuring a main character who wears a top hat, a pocket watch, or corpse paint.
I’d like to see an economics study that analyses how much the internet has increased the international demand for cute cat photos and what effect new technology has had on the supply of cat photography
Arizona: a great place to be…. As long as you’re not Mexican. Or a pregnant woman. Or Public Enemy.
Anaheim: it’s the Applebees of cities
Can someone please work on a Facebook political status update filter that works for the duration of 2012? All I want is more LOLcats, Lil’ B videos, and photos of my friend’s lunches. I don’t need to know how you feel about Newt Gingrich.
Slowed down and changed lanes to avoid driving over a banana peel in the road. I was afraid it might make me spin out like in Mario Kart.
What kind of unreasonable person impulse buys an ipad at a Best Buy express kiosk in an airport?
I propose a Tea Party versus Occupy Wall Street kickball game on the National Mall in Washington DC. The winner controls the Senate.
Oh, Gainesville! Let me drink of thy natural bounty: Of endless ants and flies in 98 degree weather; Of chatty freshmen in Library West; Of bikes, bikes, and more bikes cruising to the Atlantic on a warm Thursday night… And when I die, let Superior Towing cart my body away and store me on Depot Road for $100 a day.
Our new office is directly adjacent to an abandoned hospital. In fact, there’s actually a catwalk connecting the two buildings. Better start wearing ghost repellent
May the good karma you create come back to you exponentially and may your happiness rise, like an asymptote, ever-closer towards infinity.
Electrical outlets at airports are like watering holes on the African savannah
For a refreshing tropical scent that will last for days, leave that used banana peal inside your pillow case instead of throwing it out.
